Secret BBC team 'more Bono than Bond'
A team making a programme for BBC 2 from Hat Trick productions snuck into the the Bristol offices of Leave.EU today, going around with secret microphones and hidden cameras asking random staff members if they thought they had "ruined the country".
"Brilliant effort, chaps," commented Andy Wigmore, Leave.EU's irrepressible Head of Communications. "An enterprise after my own heart – but no cigar."
"Our security team rounded up these pound shop secret agents and handed them over to Her Majesty's finest outside Topps Tiles long before they managed to infiltrate my office, sadly", added Leave.EU co-chairman Arron Banks.
Mr Banks described the hapless pair, pictured below, as "More Bono than Bond, honestly. You would think a broadcaster drowning in public money could pull off a more competent operation.
"I understand they were looking for Vote Leave ringmaster Matthew Elliott. He hasn't asked me for a job yet, I must say, but provided he doesn't come over wearing a wire as well my door's open.
"It's all good fun, of course, but a bit tragic to see the BBC still trying to fight the Remain campaign's battles for it well into July.
"Guys, we know the stupid, racist public didn't vote the way which you, in your great wisdom, told them they should, but it's over now: the horse has well and truly bolted.
"If you must continue wasting time crying over the result, show up to one of those whingefest anti-democracy protests the spoiled millennials and superannuated Leftists keep throwing outside Parliament on your day off. Don't waste time making fools of yourselves at my offices on the license fee payers' dime."